Submitted by Amy M. from Houston, TX

I am 46 years old. I am from Houston, TX, and a patient in the Texas Compassionate Use Program (our medical program).

I have been dealing with the symptoms of CPTSD since around the age of 7 or 8. They increased over the years, and I was diagnosed as Bipolar at 27.

Depression, Anxiety, Flashbacks, and More…

Most of my life I was severely depressed. I now realize that my nervous system was extremely taxed. That caused me to have bouts of depression and exhaustion so bad that sometimes it felt like I was in bed for weeks. I felt triggered, hopeless, alone, misunderstood, and suicidal for much of my life. My relationships suffered.

Before I came to Cannabis, I had spent over 20 years on medications and working with various medical professionals. Some weren't very responsible, so I still struggle to trust doctors.

I had good results with cognitive therapy, but there were still bouts of anxiety, depression, and what I now know were PTSD-induced flashbacks.

Doubts Creeping In

After thirteen years of various pharmaceutical regimens, I felt that the side effects of my medications outweighed the benefits, and I worried about the long-term impact on my organs. Some drugs I was on had only been recently approved by the FDA and had even been prescribed off-label (they were not FDA approved for my condition). There were a lot of question marks for me about how they could affect my long-term health since the doctor anticipated that I would be on these medications for the rest of my life.

How I Learned About Cannabis

I was lucky to have so many people helping me on this journey. One of my heroes is Dr. Bonni Goldstein. I first saw her in the documentary Weed the People. I have read her books, and I "Highly" recommend her book Cannabis is Medicine. I call it the medical Cannabis bible.

I recently had the privilege of taking a course directly from Dr. Goldstein. I received a certificate from her for Cannabis Education for the Healthcare Professional. Learning directly from her boosted my confidence even more that I had chosen what was best for me.

I also consider every moment I get to learn from Dr. Ogadinma Obie a precious gift and I’m grateful for how generous she is with the knowledge she imparts.

I was lucky also to have the support of my doctors and mental health professionals eventually. There was a road to advocacy there for me, but it was worth it.

The Struggle with Stigma

I have struggled with stigma. The more educated I got about the plant and how it works in the body, the better I felt about it. I watched the documentary The Scientist: Are We Missing Something (available on YouTube) early on in my learning. Dr. Mechoulam (The Scientist) is considered the godfather of Cannabis for discovering THC. He studied it right up until he recently passed away. Watching this sweet scientist in Israel, an older man and a scholar speaking about the benefits of this plant has helped me see the plant has medicine.

My Dosing Approach

I am lucky that very low doses of Cannabis help my issue. In the mornings, I take low doses of multi-cannabinoid formulas, including CBD, CBDA, CBG, CBGA, THC, and THCA. They don't cause me to feel intoxicated. They help me focus and start my day.

When I have breakthrough symptoms of anxiety or high stress or am going into a situation that may trigger trauma, I have a 4:1 CBD to THC tincture that works very well for me.

If a trauma trigger suddenly hit me, I would opt for a 1:1 tincture of THC to CBD to help me ride it out.

Sleeping is something that has always been a challenge. The doctors used to give me Xanax for that. Now I can take low-dose THC in a gummy form so it will stay in my system longer, and I can stay asleep. That's usually around 2.5 mg on a regular night. I can increase it to 5 mg if I am particularly stressed out, have had a trauma issue, or am dealing with PMS or cramping. That's the beauty of Cannabis; sometimes, it helps with stuff we hadn't anticipated. For me, it even helped my hair stop thinning and get healthier. That's a bonus!

Before and After Cannabis

Before incorporating Cannabis for my condition, I was on three heavy-duty medications that I worried would have long-term repercussions. I dealt with weird side effects, and I still battled PTSD triggers regularly. Doctors had yet to confirm my CPTSD diagnosis because they were honestly okay with where I was and never looked beyond the bipolar diagnosis.

After incorporating Cannabis to address my health issues, I got so much more in touch with my body. There is something about the plant that calls to us to do that. I started learning new ways of looking at things because Cannabis helped me create an arm's distance between myself and my trauma.

These new perspectives helped me create new neural pathways. I got to CHOOSE new ways of thinking and new ways of reacting. That never felt available to me before. I couldn't get enough distance from the trauma to find new ways to respond. Once I was able to do that, I started seeing new connections. I saw that what I thought were panic attacks were flashbacks. I took these new insights to my doctors and therapists, who agreed that CPTSD was a more accurate diagnosis of my symptoms.

I started to learn more about the nervous system, and I used Cannabis to tap into my intuition to see what else I needed. I started meditating, doing breathing exercises, doing restorative yoga, and using a weighted blanket. I began to take control of these situations when they happened, and I started to anticipate when they were coming on and stop them in their tracks. I also learned to give myself grace.

Cannabis Wasn’t the Only Answer

I am proud of how far I have come. Cannabis wasn't the only answer. But it has been such a facilitator and an ally in overcoming the things about depression and PTSD that debilitated me. I don't feel that way anymore. Cannabis helped empower me.

This is Amy's personal story and not meant to be medical advice. It is for informational purposes.

To work with a medical Cannabis professional, please visit our directory of coaches, educators, and medical professionals. Everyone's Endocannabinoid System (ECS) is different; good results start with the right approach. You don't have to figure it out on your own.

If you need help with any terminology in this article, you may find some answers in our glossary.

Effective Cannabis Newsletter is a platform to educate on the vital role of the Endocannabinoid System (ECS) in one's health. The information is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. All content, including text, graphics, images, and information contained in or available through this newsletter is for general information purposes only. It is not medical advice; it is health awareness.